Be Content

I have a question, one that I have asked many times over in the last three years.  "If no one was there to brag about what they had or where they have gone or what they have done...would you then be content with your own accomplishments?"

So many times my family members have looked at a car or house or clothing or electronics of another person and gotten upset that they don't have those objects, nor the means to get them.  When talking to them, I want to know for myself if I do the same thing...and I do. 

I am a simple person.  My husband doesn't need to buy me diamonds, because he knows I won't wear them for fear of losing them.  He no longer buys me clothes because he knows my preference would be Walmart or Target to save money.  I would rather fix something I already own than to dump it and buy something new, and I will wear the heck out of it before I give up on it.  (My last van I was emotionally attached to)

My husband see's the grand houses that people his rank own.  He wonders why after so many years int he service, does he not have something similar to show for it.  He see's the huge powerful trucks and looks with disgust at his little gray car.

What do I see when I look at the same thing?  I want a house where I plan to settle for good, not just any house in any state the military drags us.  I don't want a huge house for a small family, especially since they will be moving out.  I didn't have my own room and they don't either.  A big house turns cold without people in it, and the electric bill doesn't help to warm your heart as your family leaves.  I want my little house on a spot where I can see the woods and ocean at the same time.  I will be patient until then. 

As for the huge trucks, the show pieces, the gas guzzlers?  There is no reason to own one other than to brag and be vain.  For a person that goes mudding, a crappy truck worth destroying is best.  For the person that goes 4 wheeling or car crushing in shows?  A crap truck worth destroying (but looks good with a fake exterior) is also what is used.  So who uses the big lifted trucks?  Well, men with money that want bragging rights.  That's it.  A vanity item that shows status.  Well, my husband has six kids, a loyal wife, and two dogs that meet him at the door.  I would hope he sees the value of this over a show piece.

I have friends that have gone from one state to another in one weekend on shopping sprees.  Yes, I was envious, they make the same amount of money as I do, how in the world did they manage the gas money?  Well, a little plastic card works wonders for that freedom.  I don't have one.  I have never applied to the many many offers in the mail.  I knew from working at a protection company that it was a sure way into debt.  I choose not to go that route.  If that means no weekend runs to other states with a car full of clothes that will get lost in my closet after a few wears then so be it.  I have peace of mind, and that is harder to come by and has higher value to me.

So, if these people weren't standing in front of you, if you could just shut it all out and look at just yourself, would you be satisfied?  Would you be content with who you are, what you have, and where you are going in life?  If not, make some changes.  I am.  But they are all about me, not the outside world or all the glimmering lives that others lead.  It's my quest to Be Content with just being me and living my life. 

"You were born with all the gifts and qualities that you will need to be successful in this life."

Photo and Blog

© 2012 Jennifer Rath

I Choose...

~I choose to wake up every morning with enough time to relax before starting my day.

OR

~I choose to hit the snooze button if that extra nine minutes will do me some good.

~I choose to have a good breakfast in the morning with all the right vitamins to give me energy through the day.

OR

~I choose to have that cup of coffee and Pop tart while I browse the networking sites.

~I choose to stick to a strict schedule so that my children are prepared and healthy both emotionally and physically.

OR

~I choose to give them pizza for dinner, give them a goody at the store, and pop them in bed with me after staying up an hour too late.

~I choose to get my butt out on the treadmill for at least 30 minutes a day and fight the bulge age brings with it.

OR

~I choose to enjoy that piece of birthday cake without counting the calories in every bite.

~I choose to wake up in a good mood and share that mood with others as the day goes by with a smile for everyone I come in contact with.

OR

~I choose to keep to myself, letting my furrowed brow be a deterrent to any unsuspecting conversationalists.

~I choose to be pleasant, to hold my tongue and my opinions for the sake of argument.

OR

~I choose to let loose with screams and rage until the heaviness in my chest has lifted.

~I choose to be understanding, meek and mild, totally forgiving when I have been forgotten or mistreated.

OR

~I choose to stand tall, to move forward, to do what I love and fill MY time with ME without any excuses or explanations.

Every day I get that choice what to do with my body, mind, heart, soul and life.  It is mine, and I can share it how I please, or keep it to myself as well.

I control ME and no one else.

MY life is MY choice.  

Why show the Worst?

I have had the chance to watch TV both last night and this morning. Watching Television is not something I do. I listen to it, yes, while I am wandering around the house DOING things. My husband has control of the remote, which I gladly gave. Most times, if I actually sit with the family to watch, I usually fall asleep on the hubby's lap.
I decided last night that I was going to start my vacation early, which meant sitting on the couch with control of the remote. Bad, baaaaad move. I did NOT like what I found.

Why is it that we, a nation with so many prejudices, find it entertaining to watch shows that create MORE prejudice by how people are portrayed?

*First there was Jersey Shore. This random group of crazy kids/young adults, get picked to do a show by how nuts they can be, claiming they are the true portrayal of the Jersey Shore. Makes me NOT want to go there.
*Then there was Buckwild. We have images of hick, and these kids decide to match what we imagine Huck Fin and Tom Sawyer to be. They scream, they fight, they play in mud, drive dirty trucks, and generally talk so slurred you can't understand what they say. And they claim their "Holler" (place they live) is the norm in West Virginia. More teens/young adults, acting a fool, and keeping people from visiting their state.
*Oh, we can't forget Washington Heights, can we? It hasn't premiered yet, but just the commercials make me cringe. A bunch of teens/young adults again, all with issues. This group happens to be mixed between preppy and gangsta, both in clothing and attitude. Now we will have it set in our minds that THIS behavior is the 'norm' in Washington Heights and won't want to visit there either.

I know what you are thinking, if we did a show about the normal life of normal people, we would be SUPER bored. Probably. I guess we all need a little Honey Boo Boo to make ourselves feel a little better about who we are. I only needed to see THAT once.
So why show the Worst in people? Because the Best doesn't get you the ratings. I guess I will have a little less false advertizing in my home and get my kids out there to make their own judgments.
I don't want to promote this stuff, but just in case you want to look for yourself to see what I am talking about without doing a lot of research, here are the links: (copy paste, I don't want them linked to my page so I didn't activate the links, lol)

http://watching-tv.ew.com/2013/01/03/buckwild-review-mtv/

http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1699645/jersey-shore-buckwild-advice.jhtml

Joey vs. Spock

Joseph is my son, seven years old, and has Asperger’s. This means he has a whole new way of looking at things that I have never seen before, and I get to share in his adventures. I often write down and share “Things Joey Says” because it makes you say hmmmmmm. Joey is a logical thinker. Things must make sense in his life for him to understand or follow through with what you have asked of him. If it doesn’t, he will pause and fairly let you explain, but just once. This is your ONE and ONLY chance to get him to comply. Example: “Joey, drink your Hot Chocolate before it gets cold” “It’s too hot and will burn my lips” “Well, its Warm Chocolate then, and just fine to drink. It is not called Cold Chocolate because THAT is actually Chocolate MILK.” (Here is a Hmmmmm moment for him. This seems logical. But do I really have him?) He picks up the glass and looks in it. “It still feels like it is going to burn my lips though…” he questions me. “Then do the cool down secret.” “Secret?” (I think I might have him. No one can resist a secret!) “Yes. As you tip the cup, and the liquid is coming toward you, sip IN with equal parts air and (careful here) Warm Chocolate. The air cools the Warm Chocolate down BEFORE it passes your lips. And THAT my friend, is why adults like to SIP their coffee. NOW you know the secret.” He smiles, he tips, he sips, SCORE!!! Logic wins. Now imagine his bed time stories…they must come from a book. It’s true then, the ones that he can see in the pages. The ones he can read the words himself if he wanted to, that is ‘true’ to him and he believes it without any questions. Now, if you tried to look to the ceiling and make something up on the spot, you will NEVER leave the room. He will question every aspect of your fairy tale until you want to shout THE END and go running with whatever amount of hair you have left. It’s best to grab a book. Last night he crawled in bed with his dad and I. (Not fun, and not our preferred method of rest, let me tell you) and asked for a story. Dad was sitting up doing some last minute things (on the ever present phone) and I was NOT willing to go grab a book. I wanted the fantasy on a whim like I had with my other (now teen) sons. I decided that with no book, and that Joey was just going to have to participate in this story telling himself. How can he question what HE tells US?! Attempt One: “Joey, pick five things you can see in the room, then tell me a story about it” “No thanks. You do it Dad.” All eyes on dad….no sound…a sigh…phone goes down….”Okay” Dad picks five things and the story is about 3 sentences long. This is NOT acceptable to Joseph as a bedtime story and demands a re-do, which his father refuses. Joey claims he can do better! (Well played Dad) He launches into a story about a wonderful breakfast (I guess he was hungry when he went to bed?) This means that the character must go across a lake in a boat, get out of the boat, tie the boat up, walk across the grass, go into the cabin, pull out the pan, put the egg in the pan, put spices on it (salt and pepper to be exact), cut the egg up, then eat it. The Perfect Breakfast! And the story was told with only the pictures in his head. (The words he picked were Person, House, Egg and Pan) There was no need for him to add the rest of the details, but to him, it has to make sense. A person doesn’t just show up somewhere, he has to take a trip to get there. You can’t just get out of a boat, you have to moor it and tie it, then walk to your destination. (Daddy put his phone aside once or twice to listen too) All I wanted to know was WHAT was in this PERFECT breakfast!? If I don’t give him a good reason to fall asleep, whatever we are doing right now is perfectly acceptable to continue. And what parent has EVER given their child an acceptable reason to fall asleep? I don’t think there is one. So my mommy desperation kicked in. Use the imagination God gave you, I demanded myself. “Joey, do you know why people in books and TV talk about Dream Land? Do you know why everyone calls it the same thing?” Pause. “Why?” “Because it is a Real Place that people go to all the time. Do you want to go?” “No it isn’t. That means go to sleep!” he laughs at me, thinking he caught me. But I have planned for this and have more up my sleeve. “Actually, it exists at the exact same time as the world you are in right now does. The big brothers are already there. They get to go there EVERY night and do what they want, even fly or breath under water.” To make it ‘Real’, I must add my own experience…”I don’t like flying very high up, because it’s scary to me, so I just stay close to the ground and go over cars or sometimes trees and things…” Add in the wispy voice, as if I am wishing to be there right now, doing the things I am talking about. “What else can you do there?” (I think I have him but let’s drive this sucker home!) “ I have done a lot. It depends on what you like. You can be super strong, and lots of other things. I want to go back right now. We are only sleeping in this world, and that is boring, so I get to go to Dream Land and play until it’s time to get up!” “How do you get there?!” (the logic is still there, even though the little boy wonder is in his voice) “It’s easy. You fall asleep. You make your eyes dark by closing them, and then you listen to the fan, because that is the noise in the tube between here and Dreamland.” I got no response, but I didn’t dare say anything else. I knew by how quiet he was being, by how still he was that his little logical brain was spinning with the possibilities but still fighting him on if this was real or not. “Dad, shut off your phone. My eyes need dark. I am trying to go to Dreamland!” Dad shut off the phone and lay down too. I think he was looking forward to Dreamland just as much as we were now. Sometimes, you CAN make the illogical completely logical. Insert triumphant smile here.