Disrespect is OBVIOUS even if you are OBLIVIOUS.

Respect is a valuable tool that we teach our kids from the beginning. It's also something we learn as we grow and form new relationships. Respect for a man and woman, the foundation of a home, the husband and wife fixture, the basis of all strong relationships are what our children learn first. They see their parents interact. They see them communicate with words and gestures to and for each other. A little girl will copy this behavior with her dolls in play, so you know they are watching and listening at all times. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I sat in a restaurant tonight and was given a lesson on what happens when we don't watch what we teach our children. A child was in line with his mother at the buffet and she scolded him attempting to put his hand in a dish he wanted. He out right said, "I'm telling Dad on you!" If it was me, I would have laughed that my child even THOUGHT to say something so absurd. But this mother was terrified and chased after her son. They got to the table and (I could not hear across the room) he pointed and stamped his little foot at his mom who stood dumb holding his plate. The dad took the plate from her hands, gently led the boy to the bench, then raised his voice to the woman and pointed for her to go back to the buffet....WHICH SHE DID! This FATHER/HUSBAND/MAN is teaching his son to disrespect his mom, which in turns teaches him to disrespect his girlfriends/wife/ALL women in the future. I was stunned. Obviously that is how they run their family. She chooses to stay with someone that belittles her in front of her child in a restaurant full of people. But THEIR CHOICES are ruining the future of a little boy and another child, quite possible female, sitting at that table as well!!! I witnessed fights and arguments growing up between my parents, I am sure we all do, it's healthy to disagree. But for every one of those fights, I saw love, a hug, wrestling or even an occasional butt grab. (Insert blush here) I knew that it was possible to love and respect the person, but not their idea's and choices. I learned growing up and having to face those issues myself in marriage, that same respect I was taught as a child would be needed. My husband infuriates me sometimes. Sometimes I just don't feel like talking it out or fixing the problem right away...but I DO NOT DISRESPECT him in the process. No names you can't take back. No gestures that leave marks on the skin, heart or mind. And never, NEVER belittle him in PUBLIC!!!! We just don't DO that! Not in front of friends or family, not in front of our children. It's okay to point out a problem, to disagree. Do NOT make it a personal attack with added nasty tones, a dirty look all the while pretending you and your spouse are the only one that can understand what is going on between you. Disrespect is OBVIOUS even if you are OBLIVIOUS. The rest of us, and especially the children that are a part of the family daily, can see it. Don't make your kids think this is how you treat someone you love....