Broken Bird

Comment of a friend of mine, a male. "I always seem to get the broken birds, and when I get them all patched up, they fly away. No more broken birds for me." This was said over seven years ago, and he has found himself two more broken birds since then. I guess he is just the old fashioned type, where he feels it is his duty to protect us women. I asked if he thought we were less 'tough' in life than the males and his reply was 'you are supposed to be.' I guess that doesn't really answer my question, but his honesty doesn't make me think any less of him. For him, this is a true statement. He feels that opening doors, changing tires, plowing snow, even yelling at sales men is his DUTY as a male. He says his mother was hurt, and he took care of her himself from a very young age, as well as protected his sisters as he grew up. He didn't have a father, and he had no other brothers, so he grew up learning this on his own. I was his broken bird, although when he said so at the time, I got REALLY angry. Surprisingly, it was at the time we were going our separate ways peacefully. I just thought we had grown apart...but later I thought about it. He was right, we out grew each other...my NEED for him was gone. Not my respect for him as a person, but my real need for his support and encouragement was no longer a daily thing. I had respect for myself and could stand on my two feet. He was right. As soon as he was done healing the Broken Bird, they flew the nest. There is no real blame for it. Neither party is then getting their needs met. He wants to protect, shelter and love her like a treasure....while she has grown to stand up on her own, become independent, and believe in herself. Sheltering becomes stifling, protecting becomes obsession, and love doesn't feel like real love anymore. It is human nature to grow and better themselves. It is not her fault that she doesn't want to be protected any longer. And it's not his fault for wanting to protect still.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Eventually he will find the woman that doesn't mind the man being in charge, taking care of her, protecting her, and cherishing her. This may mean she agrees to stay home, raise kids, cook dinner and clean house. It may not. To a lot of people this may seem 'old fashioned' but there are BOTH male and female that still feel this way and want this lifestyle.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I think it's very possible that one day, after healing and releasing so many broken birds, one of them may choose to stay. And that's okay.